New Fiction 2019 – April

The Favourite dir. Yorgos Lanthimos (2018)

This was a fun movie about two adversaries jockeying for power and then, holy shit, what, it’s not that at all. But I loved it, it’s the kind of thing I want to read but who has the time, who? You might say it’s my… favorite.

Creed II dir. Steven Caple Jr. (2018)

Another movie of adversaries. Adonis Creed is the same man, out to prove something, and so is his rival as the son of the man who was humiliated by Rocky in Rocky IV. However, this man is far more fucked up, and his emotional arc is the stronger of the two.

If Beale Street Could Talk dir. Barry Jenkins (2018)

The injustice in this movie is the quiet, seething kind. The movie shows people trying to live within the rules and shot down at every opportunity. But their love, their connections to each other, provides the hope that allows them to survive. The movie never crescendos the way one might expect, much like Jenkins’s last movie. It just continues, like the best stories, like life.

A Private War dir. Matthew Heineman (2018)

Journalists of war exhibit a certain bravery to tread into war and tell the story of those who must suffer it. This telling of the life of Marie Colvin shows that need we all have, I think, to do the thing that we know we shouldn’t. We shouldn’t imperil ourselves. We shouldn’t tell the stories of those who we ignore, because then we must face our willful ignorance.

The Spectacular Now dir. James Ponsoldt (2013)

A romantic comedy with some edge, something I think has become more prevalent recently. Sadly, we have a dude with an alcohol problem, and a girl who he uses to get over himself. I only cheer for her to tell him to fuck off.

Shazam! dir. Peter Safran (2019)

Not what I expected. The movie leans into family-friendly and focuses on levity, taking its time with building the hero out of the boy. In truth, it’s a frustrating journey, but perhaps that’s what it is to watch children struggle to find their place in the world.

Avengers: Endgame dir. Anthony Russo and Joe Russo (2019)

I’ve only watched it once, but something felt… off. Or I guess, felt too perfect. It was too buttoned up, too many solutions. The part I was most fascinated with was the fallout of the previous movie’s actions, living with that kind of loss. And they touch on it, with some characters driven by it. But the world remains. Maybe that’s how it is? The world will always remain.

Bob’s Burgers – “Brunchsquatch” (2017)

Beefsquatch! Gene is the kid I wish I was, entertaining and outgoing. Also, I’ve never had brunch, but as I understand it the boozy orange juice is the highlight, yeah?

Bob’s Burgers – “The Silence of the Louise” (2017)

Mysteries can be a real hoot. Solving them, finding clues, you know. And mysteries in primetime cartoons are the hootest.

Bob’s Burgers – “Sit Me Baby One More Time”

(2017)

I traveled all around in March and April and ate an embarrassing amount of expensive food for free. And let me tell you, good as it was, it’s never worth the price. Some burgers may be better than others but, at the end of the day, you’re just eating a plop of ground-up cow muscle.

The Simpsons – “Holidays of Future Passed” (2011)

I’ve been doing a ton (ton!) of research on The Simpsons for some upcoming projects. Part of the research is watching every single one of its 650+ episodes. This episode, one of the many that skip ahead to see the family in future times, was pleasant, but didn’t quite hit the jokes-per-minute average that the old episodes achieved. It was interesting to skip ahead and see where they’ve gone.

Star Trek: Discovery – "The Vulcan Hello” (2017)

Oh no. I’m one of those fans who is going to complain about changes, like the klingons’ radical physical and cultural alterations. I understand the old Star Trek is dead, long live Star Trek, but it’s a hurdle just the same. I hope to watch the rest of this series sometime soon and get a better sense of it. As you know, Star Trek is never good right out of the gate.

Luther – Series 5 (2019)

Luther, man, what are you doing? These last couple of series have seen Luther make some real questionable choices, perhaps showing the fallout of all the decisions he’s made in previous series. Like with Shazam! up above, it’s difficult to see characters fuck up so bad and for so long. But, always a but, I understand that sometimes shit happens, and you respond as best as you can.

New Fiction 2019 – April

The Favourite dir. Yorgos Lanthimos (2018)

This was a fun movie about two adversaries jockeying for power and then, holy shit, what, it’s not that at all. But I loved it, it’s the kind of thing I want to read but who has the time, who? You might say it’s my… favorite.

Creed II dir. Steven Caple Jr. (2018)

Another movie of adversaries. Adonis Creed is the same man, out to prove something, and so is his rival as the son of the man who was humiliated by Rocky in Rocky IV. However, this man is far more fucked up, and his emotional arc is the stronger of the two.

If Beale Street Could Talk dir. Barry Jenkins (2018)

The injustice in this movie is the quiet, seething kind. The movie shows people trying to live within the rules and shot down at every opportunity. But their love, their connections to each other, provides the hope that allows them to survive. The movie never crescendos the way one might expect, much like Jenkins’s last movie. It just continues, like the best stories, like life.

A Private War dir. Matthew Heineman (2018)

Journalists of war exhibit a certain bravery to tread into war and tell the story of those who must suffer it. This telling of the life of Marie Colvin shows that need we all have, I think, to do the thing that we know we shouldn’t. We shouldn’t imperil ourselves. We shouldn’t tell the stories of those who we ignore, because then we must face our willful ignorance.

The Spectacular Now dir. James Ponsoldt (2013)

A romantic comedy with some edge, something I think has become more prevalent recently. Sadly, we have a dude with an alcohol problem, and a girl who he uses to get over himself. I only cheer for her to tell him to fuck off.

Shazam! dir. Peter Safran (2019)

Not what I expected. The movie leans into family-friendly and focuses on levity, taking its time with building the hero out of the boy. In truth, it’s a frustrating journey, but perhaps that’s what it is to watch children struggle to find their place in the world.

Avengers: Endgame dir. Anthony Russo and Joe Russo (2019)

I’ve only watched it once, but something felt… off. Or I guess, felt too perfect. It was too buttoned up, too many solutions. The part I was most fascinated with was the fallout of the previous movie’s actions, living with that kind of loss. And they touch on it, with some characters driven by it. But the world remains. Maybe that’s how it is? The world will always remain.

Bob’s Burgers – “Brunchsquatch” (2017)

Beefsquatch! Gene is the kid I wish I was, entertaining and outgoing. Also, I’ve never had brunch, but as I understand it the boozy orange juice is the highlight, yeah?

Bob’s Burgers – “The Silence of the Louise” (2017)

Mysteries can be a real hoot. Solving them, finding clues, you know. And mysteries in primetime cartoons are the hootest.

Bob’s Burgers – “Sit Me Baby One More Time”

(2017)

I traveled all around in March and April and ate an embarrassing amount of expensive food for free. And let me tell you, good as it was, it’s never worth the price. Some burgers may be better than others but, at the end of the day, you’re just eating a plop of ground-up cow muscle.

The Simpsons – “Holidays of Future Passed” (2011)

I’ve been doing a ton (ton!) of research on The Simpsons for some upcoming projects. Part of the research is watching every single one of its 650+ episodes. This episode, one of the many that skip ahead to see the family in future times, was pleasant, but didn’t quite hit the jokes-per-minute average that the old episodes achieved. It was interesting to skip ahead and see where they’ve gone.

Star Trek: Discovery – "The Vulcan Hello” (2017)

Oh no. I’m one of those fans who is going to complain about changes, like the klingons’ radical physical and cultural alterations. I understand the old Star Trek is dead, long live Star Trek, but it’s a hurdle just the same. I hope to watch the rest of this series sometime soon and get a better sense of it. As you know, Star Trek is never good right out of the gate.

Luther – Series 5 (2019)

Luther, man, what are you doing? These last couple of series have seen Luther make some real questionable choices, perhaps showing the fallout of all the decisions he’s made in previous series. Like with Shazam! up above, it’s difficult to see characters fuck up so bad and for so long. But, always a but, I understand that sometimes shit happens, and you respond as best as you can.

The ball is in EA’s court (again)

I’ll merely mention the fact that I’m a big fan of The Simpsons television show. It’s fairly obvious. Beyond that, however, I admire the resilience and potential of the IP. Any license that could be as pimped out as The Simpsons was in the early 90s and still sell products today is something for any business man to admire. Not that I’m a business man nor do I desire to become one, but having worked among them for some time has given me a sense for that side of the biz.

Now we move into the video games sector. Simpsons games have steadily streamed into the market since the show started and save for a few memorable games the majority have been rated from average to lame. However in 2001 Radical Entertainment reinvigorated the license with Simpsons Road Rage, and then Simpsons Hit & Run in 2003. They, for lack of a better phrase, saved the day. And Simpsons Hit & Run in turn put the developer on the map. When VU Games purchased the development studio the two companies seemed poised to continue developing great Simpsons games, or at least a guarenteed hit with a sequel to Hit & Run. I and other Simpsons game fans waited for word that another game was officially in development, but it never came.

With that said I’ll enlighten anyone who hasn’t heard the news: EA, mega game publisher based in the (boring) middle of California, signed a deal with FOX to develop several games based on the The Simpsons.

While it’s good to hear that The Simpsons will continue on following the post-Hit & Run silence, EA’s track record with Simpsons games (the mediocre to bad Simpsons Skateboarding and the average to excellent Simpsons Road Rage) is up in the air. I suppose the point of this nonsense is a message to EA:

Dear EA,

I’ll be first in line to fork over the green and buy any Simpsons game you release, so do not screw me over with a crappy title.

Thanks.

P.S.: How’s about we get fully playable versions of Larry the Looter or Escape from Death Row?

The ball is in EA’s court (again)

I’ll merely mention the fact that I’m a big fan of The Simpsons television show. It’s fairly obvious. Beyond that, however, I admire the resilience and potential of the IP. Any license that could be as pimped out as The Simpsons was in the early 90s and still sell products today is something for any business man to admire. Not that I’m a business man nor do I desire to become one, but having worked among them for some time has given me a sense for that side of the biz.

Now we move into the video games sector. Simpsons games have steadily streamed into the market since the show started and save for a few memorable games the majority have been rated from average to lame. However in 2001 Radical Entertainment reinvigorated the license with Simpsons Road Rage, and then Simpsons Hit & Run in 2003. They, for lack of a better phrase, saved the day. And Simpsons Hit & Run in turn put the developer on the map. When VU Games purchased the development studio the two companies seemed poised to continue developing great Simpsons games, or at least a guarenteed hit with a sequel to Hit & Run. I and other Simpsons game fans waited for word that another game was officially in development, but it never came.

With that said I’ll enlighten anyone who hasn’t heard the news: EA, mega game publisher based in the (boring) middle of California, signed a deal with FOX to develop several games based on the The Simpsons.

While it’s good to hear that The Simpsons will continue on following the post-Hit & Run silence, EA’s track record with Simpsons games (the mediocre to bad Simpsons Skateboarding and the average to excellent Simpsons Road Rage) is up in the air. I suppose the point of this nonsense is a message to EA:

Dear EA,

I’ll be first in line to fork over the green and buy any Simpsons game you release, so do not screw me over with a crappy title.

Thanks.

P.S.: How’s about we get fully playable versions of Larry the Looter or Escape from Death Row?

Bring Back the Classics

I thought I’d contribute something more constructive than a kiss ass “good job, guys!”. If any IGN dudes read this, please feel free to forward the link to Rupert’s crew.

Acclaim was once a giant among video game publishers. Founded in 1987, the game publisher and developer became most noted for developing games based on a few original properties (such as Turok) and a plethora of games based on existing entertainment franchises including WWF Wrestling, South Park, and of course our beloved Simpsons.

Now as we all know, Acclaim filed for bankruptcy some time ago and all company assets were sold off. Although many games and series were sold in an initial sale, over 200 remaining game properties remain unsold in an auction taking place in New York. Included in the auction are the many Simpsons games they published (the entire Simpsons package is currently at $7,500). Check out the full list at www.maltzauctions.com/acclaimip.htm.

Needless to say, I was more than tempted to call them up and ask if I could place a bid right then and there. The Simpsons classic games are a good lot as a whole, and just owning the right to those games would be a fanboy’s dream. But, if I were to purchase the rights to those games in some alternate reality, I’m sure I’d get the buyer’s remorse only a few minutes after seeing my empty bank accounts.

So given that, let’s work in the realm of reality. FOX owns the rights to the characters and content. The winner of that auction would need to make a deal with FOX in order to even consider selling or doing anything other than having the materials sitting in a cabinet. The ideal scenario would be for Fox Interactive (or whatever division handles their interactive content) to purchase the entire lot at $7,500 and then make a deal with a publisher to create a classics compilation, similar to what Capcom and Midway have been doing in recent years. It’s certainly possible now that FOX and EA have entered a deal to create Simpsons games on next-gen systems.

But the real question is will the people buy it. Although I as a fan can’t imagine not buying such an awesome collection, the more casual gamers and those who actually remember the games are sure to come out with the “Simpsons games suck” tirade that is all too common when discussing Simpsons games. I hold fast to my opinion that the Simpsons games were never the greatest or most innovative but were good for a few hours of fun. I can see not buying a game like that for $50 when it was first released, but imagine a compilation of nearly 20 games that are spead across all platforms. Every version of Bart vs. the Space Mutants, all of the Game Boy exclusive releases, even the Krusty and Itchy & Scratchy games. There would have to be some legal tailoring when dealing with games that were released on various consoles, but FOX is no slouch in the legal badgering department. Add to all that a price tag of $20 and some nifty extra features (production art, concept sketches, scanned instruction manuals viewable in the game) and you’ll have a package that even the most jaded gamer would pick up. If the Midway Arcade Treasures collections can sell over 1.5 million units, I think a Simpsons collection (a far more recognizable brand than most, if not all, of Midway’s properties) would do OK.

Now if we can just get Konami to throw Simpsons Arcade into the mix we’ll have ourselves some sweet Simpsons action.

Bring Back the Classics

I thought I’d contribute something more constructive than a kiss ass “good job, guys!”. If any IGN dudes read this, please feel free to forward the link to Rupert’s crew.

Acclaim was once a giant among video game publishers. Founded in 1987, the game publisher and developer became most noted for developing games based on a few original properties (such as Turok) and a plethora of games based on existing entertainment franchises including WWF Wrestling, South Park, and of course our beloved Simpsons.

Now as we all know, Acclaim filed for bankruptcy some time ago and all company assets were sold off. Although many games and series were sold in an initial sale, over 200 remaining game properties remain unsold in an auction taking place in New York. Included in the auction are the many Simpsons games they published (the entire Simpsons package is currently at $7,500). Check out the full list at www.maltzauctions.com/acclaimip.htm.

Needless to say, I was more than tempted to call them up and ask if I could place a bid right then and there. The Simpsons classic games are a good lot as a whole, and just owning the right to those games would be a fanboy’s dream. But, if I were to purchase the rights to those games in some alternate reality, I’m sure I’d get the buyer’s remorse only a few minutes after seeing my empty bank accounts.

So given that, let’s work in the realm of reality. FOX owns the rights to the characters and content. The winner of that auction would need to make a deal with FOX in order to even consider selling or doing anything other than having the materials sitting in a cabinet. The ideal scenario would be for Fox Interactive (or whatever division handles their interactive content) to purchase the entire lot at $7,500 and then make a deal with a publisher to create a classics compilation, similar to what Capcom and Midway have been doing in recent years. It’s certainly possible now that FOX and EA have entered a deal to create Simpsons games on next-gen systems.

But the real question is will the people buy it. Although I as a fan can’t imagine not buying such an awesome collection, the more casual gamers and those who actually remember the games are sure to come out with the “Simpsons games suck” tirade that is all too common when discussing Simpsons games. I hold fast to my opinion that the Simpsons games were never the greatest or most innovative but were good for a few hours of fun. I can see not buying a game like that for $50 when it was first released, but imagine a compilation of nearly 20 games that are spead across all platforms. Every version of Bart vs. the Space Mutants, all of the Game Boy exclusive releases, even the Krusty and Itchy & Scratchy games. There would have to be some legal tailoring when dealing with games that were released on various consoles, but FOX is no slouch in the legal badgering department. Add to all that a price tag of $20 and some nifty extra features (production art, concept sketches, scanned instruction manuals viewable in the game) and you’ll have a package that even the most jaded gamer would pick up. If the Midway Arcade Treasures collections can sell over 1.5 million units, I think a Simpsons collection (a far more recognizable brand than most, if not all, of Midway’s properties) would do OK.

Now if we can just get Konami to throw Simpsons Arcade into the mix we’ll have ourselves some sweet Simpsons action.