excitementshewrote:

excitementshewrote:

Greatest quote from Homer Simpson:

“Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth…”

“I have three kids and no money. Why can’t I have no kids and three money?”

“It takes two to lie – one to lie and one to listen.”

"To alcohol! The cause of … and solution to … all of life’s problems.”

“You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try!”

“If something’s hard to do, then it’s not worth doing.”

"Trying is the first step towards failure.”

The Sugar Rant

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And our runner up:

writergeekrhw:

worlddominationofcourse:

oldnewsisgoodnews:

garbage-empress:

balaclava-trismegistus:

If I drove a bulldozer through an apple store and the cops just shoved me in a closet and pumped me full of DMT for 8 hours id literally just do it again the second they let me out

This is like the best admission I’ve ever heard that prison sentences are about fucked up torture rather than keeping dangerous people out of society.

There’s literally an entire Star Trek: Deep Space Nine episode about how effed up this concept is.

As the Sci-Fi writer in question here, do NOT invent the Torment Nexus. Seriously. No.

thekidsfromyestergay:

I think arts funding should be infinite and easily available to everyone. I think 13 year olds who only draw anime should receive funding to buy giant sets of copic markers and shitty local punk bands should receive funding for instruments and practice spaces and performance artists should receive funding for their weird and nonsensical projects

animate-mush:

tchaikennugget:

I love tumblr because “I love this character so much I want to put them in a blender, pour the results into an ice tray, stick it in the freezer, and make popsicles out of them so that I may consume their essence” is not only a common sentiment, but a socially acceptable one here

But when I, Count Dracula