Once, after e-stalking and confessing about it to a girl, we joked that I’d be a good private detective. Since then I’ve considered that perhaps I do have a knack for digging up information I’m not supposed to have because, well, why the fuck not? Hell, it’s my job to pay attention and find defects in everything I see. If something’s amiss I’m going to research it and call it out until it’s resolved.
If you want to see me passionate, deny me the facts.
(This is how governments come to spy on their citizens, by the way. So I reiterate: never place me in a position of power. Simply hire me on contract when you need something dug up.)
Now obviously this is an image from Google Maps and I’ll posit that using Google Maps to zoom in on North Korea and check out their cities isn’t detective work. But it isn’t seeing the obvious that makes a good snoop. It’s about looking at the obvious and seeing what isn’t. To that end, I think using some of my sick time to look at satellite images of cities all over the world is time well spent. I see it as an outlet for a curious mind.
And the reason why, in the current conflict of relating to other people, I’d rather not get interested enough to want to look down on them as if they are a map on a table or a crime scene to examine. It’d be much easier—not to mention healthier—to just lay it all out there and let the mystery dissolve.
