If you’d told me my mid-life crisis would take on the form of engaging with licensed media from my 90s youth in myriad obsessive ways I’d probably have believed you and waited quietly for it to hit.
Instead of the Monkey’s Paw, you find the Clown’s Nose, which instead of granting your wish in the worst way possible will grant it in the funniest way.
Item: the Cursed Clown Nose. Obviously to use it you have to put it on and give it a honk
okay no hang on because assuming it takes half a second for each bill, this would in fact take over five days of nonstop bills
